BE.

      My hearts desires have changed so much since ... well as I grow up. As a little girl I dreamed.. just dreamed of being anything, I never really new what, I just knew I would BE. In middle school I was so wrapped up in natures beauty and beautiful things (even though I did not live it or really seek a relationship with Jesus). I wanted to claim myself to something HUGE, something meaningful and full of life. I had two dreams, being a missionary and being an astronaut. Im still going to be a missionary, which is not so much a placement on earth, although it may be, but mostly just making sure I act on God's whims and talk to His people.
     I had other dreams too, being a teacher probably the most lingering. Not just any teacher, I wanted to be there for students.. not just see them and joke with them but reach out and really BE there. There is so much power in BEING.... we take being where we are, being with whoever we are, doing whatever we are doing for such granted!

    One thing I know for sure though, all my life.. ALL of my life.. during every minute there has always been an underlying tone of waiting for something else to happen.

I remember being in 5th grade telling a friend how it would be forever till I made it to high school, or dare I even think... College!

The boyfriends I had, always hoping for an engagement, marriage, sex, babies..

As a lover of Jesus! Hoping for a future with HIM in heaven and to be made perfect!

Im not saying its not healthy to desire these things, these are beautiful and wonderful things! It can even be fun and God glorifying to anticipate gifts from Him and heavenly things! but it is NOT healthy to miss out on what we already live in! Over the past year I have really learned to live in the moment. Well.. I mean I still have a long way to go for sure! But Im able to drink in the times I'm reading Jesus' word.. licking the deliciousness off of my fingers when I spend time with people I love and care about!

And I know it is cheesy to say it like that... licking the deliciousness off my fingers... I just mean to say there is so much pleasure in knowing the people I do! It IS comparable to digging into a chocolate cake with 5 different kinds of chocolate... sometimes it's messy but its always just so good! And its not that chocolate is even comparable to the people I cherish, however good food is symbolic to great pleasure so I figured it would work! (Because good food can definitely be overrated..)

Just imaging being parched, reaching for life and life to the full! The only way to know this life is to know Jesus.. not just believe. Heck... everyone believes in Him. There are more credible documents ( by atheists even) pointing to Jesus' existence and miracles than there are about Tiberious Cesar or Plato.. If anyone doesn't believe in Jesus they are a fool! The key to being a lover of Jesus, a disciple of Jesus, is not just believing in Him.. duh..!

and all this comes from me knowing that all I have is right now! I'm learning to just BE.

"My greatest regret is believing so much in the future..."

Tomorrow is not promised to you, do yourself a favor and do not worry about what it could bring... sip on the joys of today like you would a good hot chocolate. YUM!